Traveling with teenagers can be an exhilarating journey into the unknown, not just for the destinations you'll explore, but for the myriad of ways these young folk will surprise you along the way.
Some days they may jump out of their hotel-room bed, excited and eager to check out the lay of the land. Other days, (usually when you, the parent have planned something, you think will be an amazing experience) they will be grouchy, unappreciative and speak in grunt!
As any parent of a teenager knows, travelling with kids under 10 is a different beast to globe-trotting with teens.
You no longer need to pack day bags full of diapers and plan stops around nap times; instead, you're now catering to young adults who crave independence, adventure, and, let's be honest, Wi-Fi.
But fear not! With the right approach, vacationing with your teens can be one of the most rewarding experiences you'll share as a family. I speak from experience as I have 2 teens and one tween, who we have “lovingly-forced” to see the world!
In this blog, I've got some tips and tricks that'll make your next family vacay something everyone will be texting home about (in a good way!).
Involve Your Teenager in the Planning Phase
Planning a trip is one of the most exciting parts of the travel process. Involving your teenager in the planning phase of your trip is not just a clever strategy; it's a game-changer. With their assistance, you can turn the planning phase into an exciting activity that gives your teen a sense of ownership and enthusiasm for the upcoming journey.
Teens want to be heard, they need to feel that their opinion counts. Maybe they've heard about a cool café or a local skate park from Instagram influencers they follow? If they are allowed input in the planning, there is more chance that they will keep their shoulder-shrugs and complaints to a minimum!
We like to use family dinners to brainstorm destinations that spark interest and excitement in each member of the family. It’s also a great educational process for all of us; for us parents we get an insight into how much our kids know about the world, and for the kids they get to learn about some of our experiences.
Once we’ve got a destination in mind, the best fun is diving into the details all together!
I like to give my teenagers the lead on researching some of the activities or attractions. Being a laptop-lover, I always insist they use spreadsheets and send me images with their research. They're digital natives, after all, so navigating websites and finding hidden gems is right up their alley. Plus, this is a subtle way to teach them valuable planning and organisational skills!
There is this great app I love to use for all my travel planning, it's called xTiles . I use it for a lot of my visual planning, but my 14 year old uses it for school and study planning.
(If you are interested in checking it out and decide to try it, pop in the promo code Deanna_Bugalski and you can receive 25% off of the annual pro plan.)
Mix It Up : Adventure, Culture, and Relaxation To Please Everyone Along The Way
Teens don’t always share our penchant for history and culture. My family are not huge fans of museums; I know my teenage girls would love a Japanese Onsen spa experience, however my 9 year son would way prefer to go see real-life ninjas! So when planning out the final itinerary, it’s really important to make sure that there are enough activities that will appeal to everyone.
How do we do that? The key is to mix it up. A blend of adventure, culture, and relaxation can strike the right balance, keeping the trip dynamic and engaging for your teenagers and the whole family.
Embrace the Thrill of Adventure
Start by injecting some adrenaline into your itinerary. Whether it's zip-lining through forest canopies, surfing lessons at a beach destination, or a mountain biking tour through scenic trails, make sure there's at least one heart-pumping activity. It's these moments of exhilaration that often become the most talked-about memories of the trip. Plus, it's a fantastic way for your teens to burn off that excess energy and for the family to bond over shared challenges.
On our most recent family trip to Disneyland, my teens were running rampant all over the theme parks, jumping on every thrill ride on offer. My son, however was a little more trepidatious about some of the rides that “go too fast”. So, the whole family had to make a compromise. He was desperate to do the Pixar Cars Ride at California Adventure Land. A ride that did not utilise any “Lightening Lane” or “Jumping The Queue” advantages.
All of us lined up, for 90 mins, in the California heat, and waited our turn.
For those who have never experienced this ride, it starts of slow. A few twists and turns, nothing too thrilling. Then halfway through it ramps up and there is a “jump” where you feel as though the vehicle is hoisting you through the air, at a very fast pace. (Check out the video below from Theme Park Steve )
My sweet son, had no idea this was about to happen.
Whilst we were mid-air, I heard him screaming, he wanted to get off, he was petrified!
Once the ride was over, he was exhilarated. He had had the best time of his life. He was so proud of himself for conquering his “fear of fast rides”, he begged to go again and again!
To this day, the kids still talk about how much they loved that part of the trip! Our family bonded over my son conquering his fears, and over how much fun that ride was!
Soak In The Culture
As I mentioned earlier, my troop are not huge fans of museums and history. But it is really important to me that our family learns and experiences the culture of the places we visit.
Wth each family being different, we do “culture” our way!
Some great options to learn about other cultures are doing cooking classes where you can learn to make local delicacies, attending a live music event (even if you only stop and listen to a street performer for a few minutes whilst walking to lunch), or spending an afternoon in a vibrant market.
Encourage your teens to take the lead in picking a cultural activity that interests them—it could be anything from a street art tour to a traditional dance workshop. This way, they're more invested in the experience and might just discover a new passion along the way.
Relax, Max.
Downtime is crucial for everyone, but especially teens, yes, even on holiday.
Most families do not regularly spend every waking minute together when at home, so when travelling, it’s important to make sure everyone gets a little space from each other.
Your teenagers will feel this the most. After all, they are used to locking themselves in their rooms for hours on end, and when they start to crave some independent time, that’s when they will let you know by being moody, inflexible and often mean!
I recall a past trip of our where my oldest, who was 13 at the time, had woken, being particularly disagreeable one morning. We had been travelling around a city, doing many tours in the heat and having early starts and getting to bed very late in the evening.
My husband and I both became very offended and disgruntled. We felt that we had worked so hard to create an amazing trip, to show our kids things so many others may not ever get the chance to see. It was also damn expensive and we were resentful that our teenager wasn’t “sucking it up” and displaying gratitude by suppressing the rotten mood!
Being a sullen teenager, she was unable to explain to us in a calm and collected manner, “mum and dad, i’m exhausted, we’ve been so busy that I just need a day to chill out”.
Instead, she was short-tempered, ill-mannered and in general was horrible to be around.
We needed a lazy day.
So we decided to forget a trip to the very famous, world-renowned zoo, and we lay by the pool, ordered the kids juices whilst we drank rose, and all I can tell you is everyone fell into bed much happier at the end of that day!
The advice here is, make sure you fit in some “chill days” into your itinerary. Enjoy a sleep-in, have a beach/pool day, even leave the teens at the hotel and hit the shops for some retail therapy (parents can always use some time away from their kids on vaycay too!)
These periods of rest are essential for teenagers (and adults!) to process the experiences they've had, share stories, and maybe even catch up on some sleep.
Be Flexible, Like a Yogi
You've spent nights hunched over guidebooks and travel blogs, your browser is brimming with bookmarked pages on 'Top 10 Must-Sees', and your itinerary is a masterpiece that rivals a military operation in its precision. Each day is a well-orchestrated symphony of sights, sounds, and experiences, meticulously scheduled from morning to night. But here's a little insider tip: sometimes the best memories come from the unplanned moments—the spontaneous detours that invite the unexpected.
Things will inevitably not go to plan!
Travel is about discovery, and some of the most wonderful discoveries are those that you never planned for.
So when your teen suggests you change the day’s activity to accommodate something they would prefer to do, within reason, give it a go!
Teens value independence, so be open to their suggestions even while on the trip. Allowing them the freedom to make some decisions on the fly can lead to unexpected adventures.
I recall a previous time where we had planned a full day on a boat. The weather had other ideas and the torrential rain made that plan obsolete pretty damn fast!
The only thing my teenage daughters wanted to do whilst we were in this city was go look at the make-up in Sephora, as in their mind it was going to be cheaper and have a larger range than back home. (For the record, it was crazy expensive and we did all walk out with far more items than our faces could ever use!).
However, I agreed. The result was I ended up having a great time bonding with my daughters. Even though it was pretty stressful with each one attempting to monopolise my undivided attention, so they could each show me all the treasures they were discovering, I was grateful that I was there with them.
They even showed me brands I didn’t know about (because TikTok….🙄), and products I didn't know I needed (Bronzing sticks….).
I still remember that day as the moment in time I saw my daughters are young women and not just my little girls.
Try It, You Might Like It
Let’s talk about food! When it comes to traveling with teens, mealtimes can become a battleground, but it doesn’t have to.
Let's face it, sometimes after a long day of exploring, your teen might just want something familiar. And that's okay! Compromise by finding a local eatery that offers a fusion of familiar foods with a local twist. This way, they can enjoy the comfort of their favourite dishes while still engaging with the local flavours. If they want to order a burger or a pizza then have comfort in the fact that at least they are eating. You can order your own dish made from local specialties and maybe, your picky eaters will even attempt to try some!
One thing that my children have taught me is always have a safety net. Two of my three kids are extremely picky eaters! So just like packing for a 4 year-old, I always bring some muesli bars or snacks from home when we travel. It's also good to make sure you have some knowledge of the location of a chain restaurant where they can get a no-surprises meal. This ensures that if the local cuisine doesn't agree with them, hunger won't ruin the day or their moods!
When travelling with teens, you do need to make peace with the fact that on some days they will miss out on their 4 serves of fruit and veg. Embrace the idea that french fries are made from potatoes, pizza has sauce on top made from tomatoes, and a diet of plain pasta never hurt anyone.
Trust me, they will go back to their no-sugar, all-organic, quasi-veganism once they arrive home!
Live It, Then Post It : Documenting the Experience
Screen Time. No two words will incite a greater debate amongst parents in Facebook groups than this topic.
Whatever the rules are in your home, at home, you may have to accept that the rules will need to change, or be bended, whilst travelling.
For teenagers, their screens are portals to their social lives, entertainment hubs, and, let's admit it, digital pacifiers.
It may be beneficial to have a discussion with the whole family, prior to leaving for the vacation, to set some realistic expectations and/or boundaries about screen use whilst travelling. Perhaps agree on specific times for screen use—perhaps during a midday break, during long car rides, on airplanes or while waiting at the airport.
If your itinerary has included a great balance of adventure, culture and fun, then you will see that your teens will barely have the usual amount of time during the day that they would normally be on their devices.
Another option is to harness your teen’s obsession with screen time into something good!
Perhaps encourage them to document the trip from their perspective. Turn their screen time into a creative outlet. Encourage them to document the trip through photos or a vlog. Even through social media, a journal, or photography, will give them a way to express themselves. This way, they're still engaging with their devices but are also interacting with their environment. Plus, it gives them something to look forward to sharing with friends upon their return and it also creates personal mementos that they'll value for years to come!
Wrapping Up
As we wrap up our journey through the ins and outs of traveling with teens, let's circle back to what's at the heart of any family vacation: connection. The teenage years are a tumultuous time, a balancing act of seeking independence while still needing the security family provides. Maintaining open communication is the golden thread that ties the whole experience together. Be understanding of their emotions—they're navigating the complexities of growing up, and this trip is a part of that journey.
Remember, your teen is likely to feel a whirlwind of emotions as they explore new environments. There will be moments of awe and moments of frustration. Keep the lines of dialogue open, and be ready to listen, really listen, to what they're experiencing and feeling. This doesn't mean you have to solve every issue, but sometimes just acknowledging their feelings is enough to help them move through them.
Be flexible and patient. Plans might change, moods will swing, and interests may diverge, but every step is an opportunity to grow closer. Celebrate the small victories, whether it's trying a new food, making a new friend, or simply unplugging for a few hours to enjoy a sunset together.
Traveling with your teens is not just about the places you'll see; it's about the memories you'll create and the bonds you'll strengthen. It's about watching your children discover the world and their place in it. So, pack your bags, charge your cameras, and prepare for an adventure that's as much about the journey as the destination.
In the end, the success of your trip will not be measured by the photos taken or the souvenirs bought, but by the understanding and the shared experiences that will continue to resonate long after you've returned home. Keep your hearts as open as your passports and embark on this adventure with a spirit of curiosity and flexibility. Safe travels!